A Year (or Two) In Review.

It is that time of year where everybody starts to reflect on the their past year and where you shares your highs and lows....blah blah blah.

I've been pretty absent from this blog over the last two years but the last two years have been busy. Long story short...

2014: Becoming a new mom, trying to keep an infant alive and still shower and work on a semi regular basis. 2014 was pretty much a year of survival on all levels. My connection to the outside world consisted of close family and the friends I made on twitter and IG (@lwlh) during the trying first few months of motherhood. If you want a visual sum up then check my IG circa 2014. There is baby spam everywhere! : )

2015:
I look back on this year with amazement of how my baby has grown so much in the last 12 months. How could 52 weeks change a tiny person so much?!? That itty bitty baby on the top left is no more. She has sprouted in so many ways, from height, weight, teeth, hair, personality, and certainly sass. She has become the full blown toddler that we know and love in the botttom right. It makes me equal parts proud and emotional that she has grown so much in such a short time and that I'm a day away from celebrating two wonderful years with the most beautiful girl in my world.

But back to the post at hand...2015 was...a year.
A year filled with lots of trips to the playgrounds.
A year filled with her first trip to the zoo and aquarium.
A year filled with meeting her paternal grandmother and aunts and being loved on.
A year filled with rediscovering her love and hate for the beach.
A year filled with ice cream dates at the lake.
A year filled with fall festivals and fun.
A year filled with giggles, smiles, learning, and lots of love from our Amaya Bear.

But 2015 wasn't all sunshine and rainbows...it was also...
A year filled with heartache.
A year filled with tears.
A year filled with self doubt.
A year filled with disappointment.
A year filled with anxiety and depression.

It was a year filled with my highest of highs and my lowest of ever lows. A year that I will look back on with happiness in my heart from my child but also where a little part of my heart was broken and is slowly mending back together day by day. 2015 was a year. A year that I will look back on as a learning lesson in my life. Would I ever want to relive it....HELL NO....but will I ever wish it didn't happen....NEVER.

Maybe I'm an internal optimist but I believe even the tough parts of life are for the better and are learning lessons for the future. Through the shitty times, I learned alot about my self and what my strengths and weakness are and I take these lessons as a positive direction for the future.

2015.
You were okay.
I'm not sad to see you go but sayonara sucker.

2016,
I have big plans for you.
Be scared.
I'm going to make you my bitch.

How did you reflect on 2015?
Was yours good? Meh?

Unicorn Amaya...The Way She Was.

Halloween is this week and I seriously can't believe this time of year is upon us. Let's be real for a minute and admit that once the jack o' lantern candles are blown out Saturday night, that the Christmas season is unofficially upon us. We can debate this in another post (which I plan on) but seriously, the end of October is upon on us and we're saying goodbye to another great holiday.

With the coming and goings of the holiday, it has me feeling all the feels and growing nostalgic of the itty bitty baby I had last year at this time.

A little magical unicorn named Amaya...

How freaking cute was she?!?
Don't answer that, I already know.
THE FREAKING CUTEST!!!

She was a tiny little bean last year who barely had any motor skills and was just a little roly poly of love. Gah, I can't take it. I apologize for being a gushy mom and I promise I will stop talking about my kid one of these days (ha.) but I love this age where there down for anything and she isn't protesting me on her costume just yet. I'm sure all of that will change over the next couple years as her interests grow more and more and she becomes more assertive in her preferences....but....right now I get the free pass to dress her in ridiculous unicorn outfits and have myself a mini photo shoot.

She has a Halloween party at baby school this year and she will wear one of her costumes there (a hand me down) since I know she will be a stained mess by the time she comes home and then Saturday will be her 2015 Halloween debut. I'm pretty excited about this years costume too. It's going to be a hoot and might rival the cuteness of last years costume.

So what are your babes going to be?
Do you go homemade or store bought?
I would love to make a homemade costume one of these days, but mama has to work on her sewing skills first.

Either way, Happy costuming friends.

Magical Amaya

It looks like I'm starting a little blogging trend for myself. If holiday is upon us expect this little lady to creep up your way. After this, sayonara suckas...see ya at Thanksgiving. 

Okay, just kidding but that really is how things have been panning out lately. I've been quite content living life and enjoying Amaya but the fall season has graced us (and is going a little too fast for our liking) and we've been out and about doing all the fun things we can find. I love looking back at old blog posts and I really want to make a concentrated effort to document these fun times with the Amaya and all her 'first' adventures, even if they are somewhat sporadic. 

In capturing her firsts, let's take a look at little misses first Halloween...

Before we headed out to our trick or treat festivities at night, we stopped by Nannies to hang out for a bit before going to collect ourselves some candy. Not wanting to miss an opportunity to take some pictures of my little miss, we had an impromptu photo shoot on my moms porch while Amaya was decked out in her 'boo-tiful' onesie and tutu.

Before I even had a kid, I dreamed about the days and holidays we would get to do fun things together. Halloween was always one that came to my mind, since you got to dress up and go to trick or treating and to parties and such. So when it came time to choose a costume for Amaya, I wanted it to be something fun and special. I knew that there were tons of ladybugs, bumblebees, flowers, and of course Elsa's but we (more so, I ) wanted something different. So to the internets I went, and after a few clicks and questions to Bry, we found and decided on this majestical costume for Amaya.

MEET AMAYA, THE FREAKIN' UNICORN!!! 

Gahhhhh....I freaking love it so much. She was one of the only baby unicorns we saw on our travels and she rocked it in our costume. We were a little worried she may try to pull her hat off but she chilled for pretty much the entire time. In fact, she was asleep for the earlier part of trick or treating...

We had fun trick or treating with our cousins and now we can't wait to show her how to grossly overindulge ourselves at Thanksgiving. Baby girl has a greedy little appetite like her Daddy, so there should be no problems there.

Till next year Halloween!!!

'Merica Baby

Can I tell you the truth and tell you that the whole 'Merica thing kinda irks me? Bryan has shirts that say it and I catch myself letting it slip from time to time but whenever I hear someone using it like it's an actual proper word, I want to stab myself in the eardrum with a pencil. One would think you'd only use that slang in a joking manner but you'd be surprised when you live in the sticks and people actually do talk like that.

Enough about my rant though, my original intention for this post was to share how are Fourth of July festivities went. I'm feeling pretty accomplished with getting a few posts up this week so I want to keep the ball going and today is a throwback to our last passing holiday. We had a pretty low key Fourth this year and while B had a boys night, Amaya and I went with my sister and nephews to see fireworks. I wish B got more into the holiday spirit but his motto is pretty much that once you saw them once, you saw them all. He doesn't get the rush of the holidays like me and my sister so to each their own. In true Amaya fashion this year, baby girl fell asleep during the fireworks again so it's not like he even missed her reaction. I am in no rush for the months or years to fly by but I look forward to next year in hopes that she'll stay up and enjoy them then and we can do sparklers and poppers. I know she'll still be an itty bitty and will only be a year and half but I honestly can't wait to be the mom to fix festive holiday breakfasts and to start traditions that she'll remember years down the road.

She's my little love muffin now and while she can barely protest, I will dress her up and have mini holiday photo shoots before she begins to whine....'No more pictures Mom....not again' and that is exactly what I did. I scored the tutu and headband at a yard sale a month ago and it has been the best $5 I've spent in a long time...

My little patriotic princess.
If that doesn't scream America, the beautiful....I don't know what will ; )

Memorial Day

I've always been one to celebrate holidays and decorate my house to celebrate each passing holiday but now that I have a little bambino of my own, I want to celebrate the holidays even more than I already did. As I mentioned in a previous post, Amaya was born on the last day of the year last year...December 31st, so literally right from the first day of the year, everything has been a new beginning and new first for her. I always thought I'd be the mom with self control and who wouldn't go crazy and spoil their child but I'm here to raise my hand and admit my guilt that, I give this girl whatever she pleases (or whatever Mommy thinks she needs) and holidays have been no exception.

So what if I bought her 3 different patriotic themed outfits with matching hair accessories so far...
I justify my purchases to myself (and to B haha) that she can also use said outfits for upcoming holidays such as Flag Day and the Fourth of July. BOOM!!!

But yes, homegirl was rocking her first patriotic outfit this Memorial Day to honor those who served and dedicated their lives to our freedoms. We went down to visit my sister since my nephew was walking in a few parades and of course I had to go support my handsome godson.

This is my nephew Jameson nom-ing on his puffs and my sassy sister Tara who had a little 'photo shoot' while I had my camera out. She's ridiculous and I love her.  

Now onto the parade. 

It was a fun parade even though it was hot as hell out.
When Amaya and I went home that night we even had a little photo shoot. I can't take the cuteness that is a baby in festive holiday outfits. Ooooh this girl is in trouble for Halloween and Christmas.

I just want to eat her up. 

I know it's probably getting old how much I profess my love and adoration from my child but she's the absolute cutest. Those curls, those eyes, that nose, those lips.....I just kiss her apart on a daily basis. I'm lucky to be an American and to be this girls momma.

Amaya's First Easter

Better late than never but I want to share a couple pictures of Amaya's First Easter. We spent most of the day with my sister Tara but we set some time aside to have a little mini photo shoot with our girl. I want to remember these little moments and special 'first' times each holiday, and c'mon....this mama wants an arsenal of embarrassing pictures to choose from for my sweet girls high school yearbook.

Before the pictures of my Amaya bear, here is her first Easter dress that I was absolutely in love with...she looked like such a little angel, I just wanted to bottle up all the cuteness.

We didn't attend any church services or anything but I wanted to have a special Easter dress for her and this bad boy fit the bill. I loved everything about it and I might be a little sad that she's already grown out of it. Slow down, kid!

Now on to my baby Easter bunny and her tiny hiney cottontail.

Okay, just fall over dead now from the adorable-ness that is a topless baby in bunny ears.
And I just might have bought some props at Party City this weekend for a few Memorial Day themed photos. I can't stop myself now, I'm a crazy mamarazzi.

Ready For The Hunt

For Easter, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to have Amaya participate in her first Easter Activities, one of them being Easter Egg Hunts. I know she is young and won't remember any of this but I still want to celebrate each of these holidays since they're in her first year of life. She's a New Year's Eve Baby so she literally started the year anew and I want to make sure she 'experiences' all the fun things this first year of life has to offer.

I could have been a total tool and demolished toddlers to get my baby eggs but Amaya and I just grabbed a few eggs on all three of the hunts that we went to. Two were local town hunts and then one was hosted by my sister in a field across the street from her house. She did win a big yellow ducky at one and $5 at the other so I'd call her first few hunts a win.

These are what my momma dreams are made of.
I've longed for the days of having a child, a daughter, in particular that I could coordinate her outfits and hair bows and take her to special seasonal events. I'm going to enjoy these days while I can before she tells me no and starts picking out her own outfits.

Hope she's ready for all Mommy has in store for us.

Giving Thanks.

Today is the day where we're all stuffing our selves to the max and enjoying time with our friends and family over good food, good times, and good company. No matter how or who you're celebrating with, I hope your day is filled with happiness and thankfulness in your heart. Whatever you may be going through in your season of life, look for the positive today and everyday and remember how lucky you are to have the blessings you have.

I know it's been populated over Facebook and the blogs over the last couple of weeks, but I wanted to take some time out to share the things I am thankful for at this period in my life.

An Imperfect Marriage.
Seems like something weird to be thankful for but hear me out. Bry and I have a far from perfect marriage but I'm thankful that we have the marriage we do. We have gone through our peaks and our valleys and though the hard times have been some of the roughest times of our lives, it makes me proud that we persevered and worked our way through them. It's what makes our relationship and our bond stronger and I look forward to growing together as a couple with the man I call mine.

Our Little Love
On our way home from our childbirth class last week, I looked over at Bryan while he was driving and told him, I couldn't believe how far we've come from the beginning of the year till now. In February, we were mourning the loss of our first baby through a miscarriage and in a deep dark place and now here with the holiday season upon us, I sit here with a big ol' almost 32 week pregnant belly just weeks away from seeing our little babes face. I couldn't be anymore thankful for how this year has turned around for us.

Furbaby, FTW
My Mia Martian, my furbaby. I know that our relationship is going to change once the baby comes but I love having this cuddle time with her now. She's been my couch buddy when daddy is at work and I totally soak up the extra love. Hopefully she'll adjust well when the baby comes, but really, with her demeanor, I think she will be just fine. Love you M.

We Are Family
I can go through the laundry list of who's and why's of why I'm thankful but I just have to say that I have an amazing family across the board. We each have our own relationship with each other and I value each one of them dearly.

You
I know this has been a yo-yo year with myself and the blog community but I want to thank those who have stuck by me and still sent an email or text checking up on me. I love the core group of girls I've connected with and I'm thankful to call you girls, my friends. Big kisses to my favorite bishes.

Turkey Day Talk

Oooof.
I know I've been saying it every time I blog, but seriously guys, these weeks are just escaping me. I can't believe TOMORROW is actually Thanksgiving. Where the hell is this year going? Between people stuffing their birds and hanging their stockings, I don't know which side is up with this holiday madness. So in lieu of ramble jamble of paragraphs, we're going to have some Turkey Talk, bullet point style.

- This is what happens when you ask your brother in law to take a couple pictures of you before your baby shower and he makes you go all Zoolander. Haha....who are we kidding, I love hamming it up for the camera. But yes, my sisters hosted my baby shower two Saturdays ago (November 16th) and they did such a fantastic job. Since I have a long weekend this weekend, I'm hoping to get a couple recap posts up to show off my little sunshine shower. 

- This year we will be celebrating Thanksgiving at my sister Monica's house. Sadly, B has to work in the morning but I'm hoping he gets off early enough that we don't miss dinner. Bry and I usually just celebrate Thanksgiving with just the two us and eat later in the day around 4 but my sister is having it at 1 so we'll see what happens. I'm also a little sad that we won't be able to name our turkey this year (read here and here). One thing I always get excited for though is the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. It's my favorite part of Thanksgiving morning, so if you're looking for me tomorrow, you'll find me curled up on the couch, hot cocoa in hand trying my damnedest not to high kick like a Rockette. 

- While we're talking about Thanksgiving, can we talk about Black Friday or Black Thursday which it now actually is. I am probably one of the few and far between people who actually enjoy and look forward to going out in the Black Friday madness, but really, starting at 6 p.m. on Thanksgiving....c'mon now. If anyone is hip to the Black Friday game you know that in all actuality you have to be there at 4 to scout out your merchandise and get together your game plan together. Yes, I do love to score some $1 towels (ha) but I'm not willing to sacrifice dinner and time with my family for a few Rubbermaid tupperware containers. Call me crazy, but I miss the rush and excitement of being up at midnight and beyond getting our deals. I actually didn't mind since it started later and I had time to take a nap after dinner but now it's rush rush rush. I'll be heading out with my sister Tara but we won't be starting till later in the evening and probably when all the big crowds are gone. This pregnant mama doesn't mind that one bit though. 

- Again, while we're on the topic of holidays, let's talk about the mish mash of Thanksgiving and Christmas. You have two sides to this holiday fence. Those who respect the turkey and don't decorate for Christmas, speak of it, or listen to Christmas music until the last piece of pumpkin pie is consumed and those who say 'fuck it' and bedazzle their homes and blast their N'Sync Christmas album loud for all to hear all before the last Thursday of the month. I'd like to think I fall somewhere in the middle of these two groups. I've been listening to Christmas music for a couple weeks now (it just makes me all warm and fuzzy) but B and I don't decorate until Thanksgiving. Yes, I know they're less days between Thanksgiving and Christmas this year and I'm late compared to most other bloggers and their Christmas posts but it is what it is. I have to admit, this time of year is my favorite for blog reading. I love reading all the holiday posts and even if I'm reading new blogs throughout the year, I always check their archives and check out their holiday posts. Just seeing all the trees, and traditions, and cookies, and fa-la-la makes my heart happy. 

- The carpet is finally down in the nursery. *ahhhh breathes sigh of relief*

I think Bryan was tired of hearing my mouth so the day after the baby shower, he got down and got it done. I've gone through and organized all our gifts from the baby shower and now I'm on a mission to find the best decorations for our little sunshines nursery. We still need to order our dresser but that is the last piece of furniture that will go in there. We're working with limited space but I'm going to try to make it as cute as possible. 

- I fall asleep on Bryan alot. We tried to watch a movie last night and I think I only made it through a quarter of the movie before I started catching some zzz's. I feel like a narcoleptic but I can barely keep my eyes open anymore. I think it's a combination of the pregnancy and me having the stomach bug on Monday. I had embarrassingly gross pukefest at work on Monday where I not only threw up once but twice in garbage can outside of my work area. I was a mess and came home and knocked out from 4 p.m. till 4 a.m. the next morning. God bless Bryan's heart, he came up through out the night and checked on me and gave me kisses and made sure I kept hydrated. 

- It's hard to write out posts when I'm distracted by Real Housewives. Sadly, this measly post took more than an hour to put together because I got sucked into this nonsense. And with that, I'm out! : )

What are your plans for the holiday weekend? 

You cooking or heading to family and friends?

Cowboy Bryan Ya'll.

Be safe with all your littles out there tonight or if you're like me, you'll be cozied up with a blanket and some hot chocolate handing out candy to all the little monsters and princesses. I love seeing how they all dress up and can't wait till next year to outfit my little as some cute turtle or ladybug.

Hugs and kisses and spooky ghost wishes!!!

Four Day Weekends...Yes and Please!

The ten hours I dragged through at work yesterday are a thing of the past now. After what seemed like the most drawn out week, I am now upon a long weekend with four glorious days ahead of me. I know many of you teacher bloggers are rejoicing in your last days of school but I still have a little over a month till my summer vacation comes. 

Despite the chilly 45 degree windy day we're having here in Pennsylvania, I always feel like Memorial Day is the kick off to summer. Yeah, you can tell  me that it doesn't officially start till June, but I believe in willing things into existence in hope that Mother Nature gets my memo and finally sees the beauty in sunshine and warmer temps. Puhhhhleeasssseee. 

So in the mean time, while I'm snuggled underneath my woobie drinking hot chocolate, this is how I would like to see my weekend look. 

Wishful thinking friends.
Wishful thinking.

Happy Friday!!!